My Fault? Am I to be blamed for it?

I am sad and disappointed because someone kept rubbing on our 'wound'. My tears can't help rolling down my cheek... why? because I'm so so so hurt by the loved one...

We are trying, though I cannot say it is the best method but we are trying!!! And I’ve explained what we are going through now, what else do you want from us??!!!!

And don't mix the issue of keeping dog and having baby issue together. They are 2 separate matters for god sakes!!!! Keeping dog and loving animals is my nature. Doesn’t meant that I don’t want to have Baby because I’ve a dog or neither I will give up my dog even if I have a baby.

I want to have my family planning for our own sake!!! And not for the sake of those bad mouthing from those san gu liu po nonsense.

SHUT UP ALL YOUR GOD DAMN MOUTHS!!!!!

Secret Mission for this Christmas Seasons

hohoho.... Christmas is round the corner and what have I been doing??? well... I feel that I'm extra-ordinary busy this holiday seasons.

Christmas is all about thanks giving and appreciating your friends and love ones for their help, care and love rendered for the past one year. So I'm knitting something not 'big' but 'special' little stuff for the special ones ;)  Result is good!!! I hope the recipents like it (^-^)

Pa... how nice it will be if you are still with us.

What a relief !

I've been studying for the past few weeks on my Japansese N4 paper and finally exam was over this morning. What relief for me and I shall be able to put in more time on my crochet making very soon. In fact, there are few items which I've made beforehand but were put on hold for many reasons.... The sudden departure of my dad affect alot on my family and also due to the up coming paper, I got no mood and time to make anything at all.

But now that my exam is over, I can start making my crochet again though still miss my father alot at times... I still wanna fulfill my "little ambition" that I've set for myself i.e. to do charity out my art and craft making.

Today I saw my sis and mom cried again when they discussed about my dad's matter... it breaks my heart to see them tearing again... sigh... Pa, can you come back to us again?

Happy Birthday to Me....

Thanks for all the well-wishes and gifts from my family and friends... Thanks for being with me.

A Box of Chocolate Warm my heart...

I'm so blessed and fortunate to have such a thoughtful and generous boss. He will never failed to get me something from overseas whenever he travels.

This time, I got a box of chocolates (Jean-Paul Hevin) from him. He got this for me from Paris... how sweet of him... : ) And of course, this is not the only お土産(gifts) I received from him over the past 5 years…

Think I have to keep a list of what he has given me so far...  hmm... A bottle of cologne from Germany, a box of bakery in Hello kitty figurine from Japan, a set of refreshment make-up kit from Japan, a set of hand cream from Paris, An animals prints handkerchief from Japan, a piano prints handkerchief from Japan... wow now that I realized it's countless.... there are more items which I can't really remember... kekeke....

ありがとうございます。。。

永远的好爸爸！

The greatest and saddest time I had ever experienced in my life happened on Tuesday, 26 October 2010; the departure of my dad. There is no word to describe my family’s sorrow and lost at this moment but the grief and emptiness will place within our hearts forever…

My Father, who known as Ah Ji (2^nd child of the family) is a strong-willed, dependable and highly respected man. The impression that my dad gave me since young was that he was very fierce and hard to be closed with person. However, if you get to know him better, you will realise that he is actually a very passionate and caring person although he seldom expresses it out verbally to us but we all know deep in our heart that he cares alot for us. My dad is also a very responsible man for the family and under his loving care, we have never suffered from any shelter or food shortages.

My father is not highly educated but despite of his humble ability, he tried his best to provide us with good shelter, food, education and etc. A man who is not well-knowledged was being able to work his way through to support a family of seven, providing them with all the necessities and cares to the family members, who else can be greater than him? And not forgetting that my dad even supported my sis and I to further our studies in Australia and England, isn’t my dad great?

I can’t concentrate much on my work, my mind kept reflecting his imagines of those days when we were together; happy or unhappy, celebrating or quarreling… all these are priceless memories.

I keep asking myself, what I can do to bring back my father’s life, although I know this is never be possible…

Although I do not know where my dad is but I really do hope that he will be fine and had gone to a better place where it is free from sufferings and pain. I pray that he will follow the Buddha’s steps to go to 西方极乐世界. He has sacrificed too much for us.

师傅 said, every each of us is fated to be either friends, lover, sibling, kinship with another person. However, when that very special someone passed away or left us, it means that our fate with this person has ended. How cruel facts it is for human kind but these are the sufferings that all human has to go through. Thus, in order not to go through these traumas repetitively, we should avoid evil, do kind and purify the mind…so that one day we could all go to 西方极乐世界 after we depart from this world.

It is said that 西方极乐世界is a place where it is free from living sufferings, sickness, death and reincarnation. With some enlightenment from师傅, amazingly, I became more calm, especially, my mother.

Today, it has been the 11^th day my dad left us, although grief is still inevitable but I hope that every one in my family including myself could brace up soon… my dad will live in our hearts from now on.

Pa… 走好。。。

爸爸走了。。。 心好痛。。。

我想这世界上没有仍何悲伤会比失去至亲至爱来得痛苦。。。

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Ladies Crochet Collar @ $14/-

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